I’m expanding the mission of Pill Baby because I’m simply not there yet–I still want to be a mom. And I want the magazine and podcast to be able to speak to women who aren’t there yet either, as well as women who are childless.
I’m getting back to basics to help both others–and myself. I’m researching the intersection of mental health and childlessness. I’ve realized to have any hope of responding to the needs I’m hearing voiced, from IVF warriors who blog about failed infertility treatments to women who are moving from childless to childfree to filmmakers who have created documentaries about the male experience of childlessness, I need to get educated.
I’ve been trying to conceive for six years now. Six exceptionally long years. My husband and I have tried everything short of IVF, and now that it has been placed at my feet, I’m not sure I want to pursue it. Mental illness makes me unsure I can be a mom.
I want to tell you the story of how I healed my inner mom after infertility and depression. I want to tell you the story of how I learned to nurture myself, to be a mom to myself.
How do we get back on track with caring for our bodies when struggling with grief due to childlessness?
When I was first diagnosed with bipolar disorder, my mom and my grandma attended NAMI Family-to-Family classes. It helped them navigate the uncertainty and the fear of my diagnosis with information from other family members. From nami.org: "NAMI Family-to-Family is a free, 8-session educational program for family, significant others and friends of people with mental health conditions. It is a designated evidenced-based program. This means that research shows that the program significantly improves the coping and problem-solving abilities of the people closest to a person with a mental health condition. NAMI Family-to-Family is taught by NAMI-trained family members who have been there, and includes presentations, discussions and interactive exercises."
This is a great video from the nationally recognized mental health nonprofit, Depression Bipolar Support Alliance. Peers were asked, among other questions, what was their experience when first diagnosed with bipolar disorder and at what point did they realize they were more than their diagnosis. It helps to hear from real people!